This Is The Year

Catching up

2013-05-01T09:04:00.000-06:00

It's been a while! Life has been crazy, and busy and good. But I'm not getting it all recorded because I haven't blogged! What's up with that?

A few notable things that have gone on since I last blogged:

Our sweet Baby Girl was blessed in Sacrament Meeting on April 14. It was a beautiful day surrounded by friends and family. It was also a little bittersweet. Baby Girl is the first of my children not to have my dad standing in the Priesthood circle for their baby blessing. I know he was there, but I still missed having him physically with us. My little brother was also not able to be there, as he is currently living out of state. I don't like having my family spread out like this!

Baby Girl is growing up so fast, I can hardly stand it. She will be 3 months old this week. So crazy!

On April 1st I started a fitness challenge and as of Sunday's weigh-in I was down 17.4 lbs! I still have a ways to go, but it feels great to be making good progress! I'd like to be significantly smaller by the time we head to Lava Hot Springs for our family reunion in July!

I'm thinking of hosting another fitness challenge when this one ends, with my BFF Tanielle, who is also participating in this one. Would anyone be interested in participating?

Cowgirl had a lovely trip to the ER on Saturday. During her soccer game she took a HARD ball to the head kicked from about 4 feet away. It laid her out flat. She suffered a severe concussion, and is still experiencing symptoms of dizziness and pain in her neck. Today is her first day that she hasn't been suffering from a headache as well. We are continuing to watch her for any signs of complications, but otherwise it is just a slow, boring waiting game for her until she is able to return to regular activity.

The school year is winding down, State testing is under way, the weather is getting warmer (although it snowed today...what the what??), and I'm anxious for my kids to be out of school and am looking forward to the long, lazy (yeah right) days of summer. I'm committed to try and make this summer more leisurely and enjoyable with my family, and less busy and stressful. Any tips for making this happen? Thanks.

I hope everyone is doing well, and I'll be back tomorrow with a great big Proud Mama Moment.

The Tomb is Empty

2013-03-31T13:14:00.002-06:00

I love this. I love Him.

Happy Easter.

People Are Good

2013-03-28T00:50:00.000-06:00

I'm making quite a stretch here for today's PMM. That's because I want to talk about my other baby. Not one of the 5 I gave birth to, but a labor of love still the same.

For those who don't know, 7 years ago I helped start the charter school my children attend. I currently serve on the board of trustees for the school. In the early years it was like having a full time job and working overtime, only doing it for free. It takes up a lot of time.

I have a board meeting tonight. I don't want to go. I get ornery just thinking about it. It is at our recently opened second campus, which isn't exactly close to my home. I am a tired mom of a newborn. Currently a sick newborn. I don't want to go. I wasn't planning on attending this month, but some important issues that need to be discussed require all members to be in attendance. And I don't want to go.

It's times like these that I seriously consider stepping down from the board and freeing up my time to focus on other things I would like to do. And I ask myself, "why don't I resign?"

The obvious answer is that I'm a control freak, and I still want to have a say in the decisions that are made pertaining to the school my children attend. But there's also the other part:

Last week I told you about Cowgirl and her Science Fair project. Our Middle School science teacher (Mr. H) was the one at our school who sort of coordinated everything on our school's behalf. He is not Cowgirl's teacher, as she is still in the Elementary School. However he was a great advisor for the students in all the grades. He came into the school several times during days off so that students could come spend all day working on their projects and receiving help from him. This in itself shows the dedication he has to helping students learn and succeed. But I never expected that I would receive a phone call from him later in the evening on the day of the Regional competition. We were all sitting in the living room chatting when the phone rang. I answered and Mr. H was on the line. "I just wanted to call and see how Cowgirl did? Did she have a good experience, and enjoy herself?" He continued to ask a few more questions about her experience with the judges, and the pre-judging award she had received, then wished us a good night and hung up the phone.

I looked at my husband and said to Cowgirl, "that was sure nice of him to call and check on you, and see how your experience was. He's such a good guy." The thing is, I'm pretty sure we weren't the only family to receive a call that night. Mr. H is the teacher who would have called to check up on each of the students that he hadn't had a chance to talk to during the fair.

That wasn't the end of our conversation though. Hubby then proceeded to tell me about his recent experience.

I have blogged previously about the big cancer research fundraiser our school does every year. One component of this event is the Pedals for Hope 40 mile bike ride that the middle school students participate in. Pedals for Hope 2013 is just around the corner.

Hubby goes into the school a few days a week to help transport the elementary students (via bus) to a nearby sports venue for off-campus P.E. activities. He drops one group off, comes back to pick up a second group, then drops them off and brings the first group back. During his back and forth recently, he has seen Mr. C up to something heartwarming. Mr. C helps coordinate many of our outdoor experiences and activities, including Pedals for Hope.

Recently, Hubby has seen Mr. C out in the school parking lot and on the lane that leads up to our school, working with one of the middle school boys. He is helping him learn how to ride a bike. He goes around the parking lot, and up and down the lane, holding onto the bike and giving a push, running along side helping him know how to steer and stay up. For some reason this middle school boy does not know how to ride a bike. Maybe his family can't afford a bike, or his parents never taught him, or maybe he just was never able to learn. But Mr. C is making sure that this young man will not miss out on participating with his peers when they ride their Pedals for Hope bike ride fundraiser.

When hubby related this experience, it literally brought tears to my eyes. I'm misting up again just typing it up.

And this is why I don't step down. I'm so proud of a school full of teachers like Mr. H and Mr. C (yep, they're pretty much all this dedicated), and I know it's not really anything I can take credit for, but I still love that I get to rub shoulders with people of this caliber, as we work together (them working harder than me) to make our school good for students. A place where we not only educate their minds, but hopefully do a little bit to fill their souls as well.

Proud of my Girl

2013-03-23T20:35:00.003-06:00

I wanted to link up with Emmy and Kmama's PMM last Thursday, but I just couldn't seem to fit in the computer time to get it done! Better late than never though, right?

Thursday was the Salt Lake Valley Science and Engineering Fair. It was the Regional Science Fair for those who had advanced past their school science fairs, and then their district science fairs as well. My Cowgirl was one of those students and I was so proud of her.

She did a really fun project that was called Font and Impact of the Written Word. She tested 50 subjects on their memories of a list of words. Different subjects were given the list typed up in different fonts, and then tested on how many of the words they remembered. The object was to determine whether font type affected how easily someone remembered what they had read. She had a great time doing it, and thanks for those of you who helped her reach her quota of 50 subjects! You know who you are. So what do you think? Did people whose lists were typed up in a simpler font remember more words, or was it the people whose lists were typed in more busy/fancy fonts?

She's disappointed that she didn't place, or move on to Nationals, but I told her that I couldn't be more proud. Plus, to be honest - I'm not sure I have it in me to bear with her through another round of revisions to her display board! And I KNOW my wallet doesn't have another round in it!

Hubby couldn't get a great picture because they placed her right in front of a window (although she did enjoy the view of the football stadium at the U. The team was practicing!). Sorry Emmy - wrong team I know - but you take what you can get when you have to stand by a table for 4 hours waiting to be judged!

It was a great experience for her, and I'm so grateful she had the opportunity. But I sure am glad not to have to worry about Science Fair again for another year!

Linking up here!

Tag

2013-03-20T01:48:00.001-06:00

Apparently tags are making a comeback. Who remembers tags? I was sorta sad that they went away because they are great when you are stumped about what to blog. Of course I prefer the ones where you are asked a series of very specific questions, because then you don't have to think at all. But I wasn't tagged with one of those tags.

MiMi did tag me though, (she wanted me to feel like I haven't been forgotten here in blog land). Here are the rules of the tag:

Display the award logo on your blog. (MiMi didn't post it, so I can't.)
Link back to the person(s) who nominated you.
State 7 things about yourself.
Nominate 15 bloggers for this award. (Probably won't get 15, but we'll see.)
Notify those bloggers of the nomination by linking to one of their specific posts so that they get notified by pingback. (Ummm...?)

So here are 7 things about me:

1 - I hate the way I can't figure out how to copy and paste to my blog without a lame white background showing up.

2 - The thing I love most about being a new mom again is watching my other children be absolutely in love with their baby sister.

3 - The thing I hate most about breastfeeding is that you have to wear a bra all. the. freaking. TIME!

4 - I want to learn to sew. Like for reals sew. Not just operate the machine after somebody else has already threaded it, and I just have to sew a straight line. But actual sewing.

5 - I miss my dad.

6 - I haven't been to church since Baby Girl was born. I have turned into one of those super paranoid about germs moms. But can you blame me? You might remember a little thing we went through last summer called whooping cough? So Baby Girl and I send the family off each Sunday and we stay home and chill.

7 - I plan to go back on Easter Sunday.

Now for the tagging:

Myya (I know she got tagged by MiMi, but I also know she hasn't done it!)

Well, I'm being summoned by her highness who is hungry again, so that's where I'll leave it. A couple of these girls are being tagged just to motivate them to do another post!! Anyone else who wants to play, feel free to join in!

Almost Normal

2013-03-11T07:56:00.001-06:00

Well life is starting to feel almost normal again. I could still use some more sleep, but I'm actually starting to be productive again. Well, as productive as I ever was, which isn't really saying much! I'm hoping to be able to start blogging a little more frequently and also to start leaving more comment love again!

And although I'm starting to feel more normal again, I'm super anxious about my six week check up. Because I cannot. Stop. EATING! I am soooo starving all the time. I am always so hungry when I'm breastfeeding, but I swear it is worse this time than it has ever been before! I have this horrible fear that I am going to step on the scale at my doctor's office and find out that I actually weigh MORE than I did at 9 months pregnant! And I am being totally serious.

The novelty of a new sister has not worn off at all for my kiddos. They still fight over who gets to hold her first, who has held her the longest, and so on. I am glad that they like her though. :)

I'm having a lot of bittersweet moments as I watch her grow. When Monkey was born, we hadn't really made the decision that we were done having kids. So I watched her grow, and never really thought about it being the last time I would experience watching one of my babies grow up. It was later on that we decided we were probably done having kids. Then our precious little surprise came along, and knowing that she is our last, all of her little moments really tug at my heartstrings. I want to capture every moment and hold onto it forever.

I didn't know she had the skills, but Cowgirl put this sweet video together, featuring Baby Girl's newborn photo shoot. I asked her to make an altered version that kept her info private, so I could post it here on my blog.

I'm not gonna lie, I totally got choked up while watching it. But it was nothing compared to the full on Daddy -sobs coming from my husband.

I promise that tomorrow I'll talk about more than just Baby Girl! There are some other fun things going on around here. :)

2 things at once

2013-02-21T14:01:00.001-07:00

I promised my out of state brother I would blog again, and that was a few days ago, so I am a little behind!

Baby Girl keeps me pretty unproductive these days. She nurses ALL. THE. TIME. Which is actually nothing new for me, since all my kids were like that. I think it has something to do with being big babies - they need more sustenance. But I'm okay with that - because all my big babies also slept through the night by 8 weeks. So it's a decent trade-off in my opinion.

She is growing so fast I can hardly stand it. Even though we thought we were done having kids before we got pregnant with her, now that we have her I want to slow down time so we can enjoy all the little moments of her growing up. It already seems to be flying by.

Here are a few pictures of her cuteness:

Her first Valentine's Day.

In the car on her way to her 2 week check up. Which she passed with flying colors!

Since I spend the majority of my days sitting in my big puffy chair nursing her highness - I have had to learn to multi-task. You know, do 2 things at once.

Here's a list of all the things I can do AT THE SAME TIME I am nursing. I know you'll be super impressed:

Watch TV

Watch online videos

Surf the web one-handed

Text one-handed

Eat one-handed

Yell at my other kids

Did I mention watch TV?

I spend a lot of time watching TV these days. Pretty productive, huh?

While you marvel at my ability to do all these things WHILE I am nursing my baby, I'll just leave you with one of my current favorite commercials (I don't have DVR, so I see a lot of commercials as well). I like to call it, "2 things at once."

And baby makes 7!

2013-02-12T04:41:00.000-07:00

Well...she's finally here! Actually, she's been here for a week as of 8:14 tonight. I'm sure you can guess that hopping on the blog wasn't the first thing on my to-do list!

I woke up last Tuesday morning feeling uncertain whether my contractions were feeling more like real contractions or not. They were so inconsistent throughout the morning, and I just wasn't sure what to think. They seemed to be getting more painful, but not closer together at all. I was starting to feel paranoid because I hadn't been feeling Baby Girl move all day, so finally sometime after noon, I told Hubby we should probably go in, just so I could be reassured about how baby was doing. At this point, my contractions were ranging from 7-12 minutes apart. I've never gone in with them that far apart before.

To our surprise, when we arrived at the hospital, I was dilated to a 6 and 100% thinned. Crazy! My contractions still weren't very close together! But they hurried the anesthesiologist in so I could have my epidural, because they were sure baby would be here shortly.

But she wasn't done being stubborn. She kept clear up high, and was in no hurry to move down so she could be delivered. This was during the 2 o'clock hour. They started me on Pitocin in hopes that more regular contractions would help push her down. We sat there waiting until she was finally ready. She was born at 8:14 p.m., and weighed 8 lbs 11 oz. She was 20 1/2 inches long. She is beautiful and perfect and has filled our home with joy.

There's so much more I'd like to say, but it has already taken me many hours to get this post in....I could only work on it here and there in between my "summons" from Baby Girl. I will just leave you with a few (or more) pictures.

Just a few minutes old.

Monkey getting to be a big sister for the very first time.

Cowgirl wanted to fight anyone who tried to take her away.

Pixie was pretty young when Monkey was born, so it was new all over again to her.

Bookworm finally getting to meet his baby sister, after all his eagerness and waiting.

Coming home. 1 day old. I really wish my dad could have been here to help welcome her.

5 days old and taking in everything around her.

I will probably not be blogging as regularly as I'd like, and will be visiting even less - but I promise not to totally disappear again! I hope everyone is having a fabulous week. And getting more sleep than I am!

Birthday, and lack of a birth.

2013-02-04T10:01:00.000-07:00

Well y'all - I'm still pregnant. That's right - no Baby Girl yet. I was REALLY hoping she would come over the weekend so that we wouldn't have to deal with the chaos of finding rides to school, and all the other weekday activities my other kids are involved in.

I have had a few contractions off and on, but I'm pretty sure they are still just Braxton Hicks. They go away if I move around, and are not consistent AT ALL. Sigh...my very clever friend MiMi suggested that her name should be Patience, after putting us all through this! I know I shouldn't complain, her due date was only 2 days ago...but we are all ready to meet her!

Since she still hasn't made an appearance, it's not too late to enter my Baby Girl Poll. Even if you already entered, since everybody's guesses on date have already passed, you are welcome to take another shot at it!
I have my next doctor's appointment on Thursday if she hasn't come yet, and at that time he will schedule and induction - so take you best guess!

In other news, my sweet Pixie celebrated her 10th birthday yesterday. I cannot believe she is 10! It hurts my heart a little that she is growing up so fast.

The time has flown by way too quickly and I feel like it's all just passing me by! I wish there was a way for me to slow it down so I could have more time to appreciate each moment and memory.

Pixie is growing into a lovely young woman, and I could not be more proud of who she is becoming. She excels in school and loves learning. She also loves being creative. Her newest interest is making creations out of "designer" duct tape. She got a bunch of rolls for her birthday and has been happily creating away. She has made suspenders, a really cute rose pen, Barbie clothes - just to name a few.

She loves playing the piano and is ALWAYS practicing. I keep trying to remind myself that this is a good thing. She literally cannot walk past the piano without pausing to play a few bars. Again, I remind myself, this is NOT annoying. Her dedication is a good thing, right?

Our life has never been the same since she joined our family 10 years ago, and I cannot even begin to imagine our family without her. I'm so grateful that Heavenly Father trusted me to be her Mom. I'm not the best at it, by any stretch of the imagination, but I know there is no one that could love her more than I do.

My Funny Monkey

2013-01-31T07:36:00.000-07:00

Time to link up with PMM and talk about my kiddos. Yeah, like I need an excuse.

First off - no Baby Girl yet. I was really thinking yesterday that I might be headed to the hospital by the end of the night. But then - nothin'. Which is totally okay, because guess what I haven't done? I haven't made this baby girl a single hairbow! That's what I'll be doing today.

But today I'm telling you about my OTHER baby girl. My Monkey. Seriously, this girl cracks me up. The stuff she comes up with is just too much sometimes.

A few weeks back she climbed into the car after school and was just beside herself. "I lost my tooth today," she said. And then bursting into tears she added, "and then I REALLY lost it!". When I asked her what she meant she told me that she had taken it out to recess to show her friends, and she lost it.

Later that night, Hubby came in to show me what he had found in place of her tooth:

Side one

Side 2

We were dying. And how could the tooth fairy deny that? So she was still compensated, even though she lost her lost tooth!

A couple of Sundays ago the girls brought home a spotlight paper to fill out from Primary. Monkey took it upon herself to fill hers out on her own, without waiting for us to help her:

Seriously? The girl has never had Sushi. And I guess it is a sad reflection on Hubby's and my parenting that the most exciting thing that has ever happened to her is turning six. I guess we'll have to work on that.

She never ceases to make us laugh. And that is such a good thing because on those days when you just want to cry - a funny six year old girl can turn it all around. We are so blessed to have her as part of our family.

I'm linking up here:

Ten Things to Smile About

2013-01-29T01:01:00.001-07:00

Because I seem to have issues lately with being bitter - I'm glad to have Emmy to help me remember that I still have lots to make me smile. Here are my 10 things to smile about in January:

1 - Back to blogging! I'm blogging more regularly than I have in a LONG time, and it feels good to be back.

2 - Pixie's 4th grade Pioneer Musical. The students write the script themselves and work really hard in preparing to perform it for parents and other students. Pixie did a wonderful job, and played the mother in one of the main families. She tends to talk really fast, and really quiet, so we were a bit nervous about how she would perform. She was awesome. She projected her voice, and spoke at a speed that everyone could understand! We were really proud.

3 - I can FINALLY see sunshine, blue sky and my beautiful mountains! The inversion has been so horrible, and we finally have a series of storms moving through that are clearing the air! Halleluja!

4 - Wonderful friends and members of my ward family who threw me a baby shower, and showered me with love, and adorable baby girl stuff!

5 - Church basketball has started. Bookworm and Cowgirl are both playing and have played 2 games each, with 2 victories each!

Not sure if Bookworm is scratching his head or fixing his hair?

Horrible blurry action shot taken with my phone.

Cowgirl's number 4. This is her first time playing basketball.

6 - Baby Girl's car seat arrived yesterday! So now, whenever she gets here, they won't hold her hostage at the hospital - because I WILL have a safe way to bring her home!

7 - My boy Chris Wingert re-signed with RSL! 3 of my favorites were traded, so I was getting nervous. But then CW's contract was renewed and all was right in the world again.

Credit

8 - Bookworm brought home his 2nd report card of all A's. At our school we grade differently and grades K-8 do not receive letter grades. But since 9th grade goes toward your high school transcript, they are graded more traditionally so it will transition correctly when they move on to high school (which is 10-12 here). Really proud of how well he's doing.

9 - This month all 3 of my oldest performed together in a music recital for the first time. Cowgirl has switched over to the same piano teacher that Pixie takes from, and she has been working REALLY hard on a piece that is way advanced for her. It is the accompaniment for the Millionaire's Hoe Down that Bookworm performed for the school talent show. I shared that here. So Bookworm came and performed with her at the recital. And Pixie has just been taking lessons for a year and is the most diligent practicer I know! She was the only student in the entire group of performers that played each of her pieces without a single mistake.

10 - I saved the best for last. This is better than sunshine, bragging on my kids, even better than CW staying in Salt Lake. I do not have 9 o'clock church anymore!!! For the entire year I get to enjoy heavenly 11 o'clock church. I have been waiting for this day since the first Sunday in 2012 when I had to switch to 9 a.m. church. Then the countdown began for when I would once again be able to SLEEP until 9 instead of have my whole family up and ready and in their seats by 9!

What made you smile this month?

I'm partying here today:

Friend Makin' Monday

2013-01-28T08:10:00.000-07:00

It's been forever since I've linked up with Kenlie for FMM - but I do love to be friendly! I have done a questionnaire similar to this in the past, but it's been a long time and some of you may be new around here, so I thought it would be fun. Also, some of my answers may have changed since then!

Also, does anybody know why Blogger won't let me copy and paste without a stupid white background around the words? It is super annoying, but I'm too lazy to retype all the questions, so I just copied Kenlie's post and then changed the answers. So sorry - you'll have to deal with the dumb white border.

Getting To Know Each Other

1. What is your favorite color? I love all happy, bright colors. But I especially am loving turquoise right now!

2. Share one or more of your talents. I enjoy playing the piano - although I'm getting pretty rusty.

3. If you were spending the day getting to know someone new, where would you want to go? If the weather was nice, somewhere outdoors for sure. There are a lot of beautiful places here in Utah to spend the day with a friend. Also, the day would definitely need to include someplace yummy to eat!

4. What is your favorite meal? It depends on my mood. Especially right now with being pregnant! I really, really love the Chile verde enchilada from a local family owned Mexican restaurant that is close by. I could eat that every day.

5. Do you prefer to text or talk? I honestly hate text. I mean, I know it is really convenient, because you can text during times that it isn't really convenient to talk. But I love a good phone call, or face to face. It's so much more personal.

6. Share something about yourself that might surprise someone that you’re getting to know. Um, I used to be skinny? I don't know - I'm pretty much an open book.

7. Do you color your hair? Yes…those stray gray hairs are getting more prominent, and when your hair is almost black - they really show up! I'm too young to have any grays!!

8. Do you wear glasses or contacts? I have worn contacts since I was in Middle School, but they are not extremely strong. I wouldn't dare drive without them, but I haven't put them in yet this morning, and although it is a little more difficult without them, I am typing up this post with naked eyes!

9. What is your favorite breakfast food? I'm not a breakfast person as in "food in the morning". But I LOVE breakfast food for lunch or dinner. And I can't narrow it down to one food. I love me a meal of french toast, hash browns, fried eggs and bacon or sausage.

10. Would your friends say that you’re sarcastic? Maybe. I don't know - friends? What do you think?

11. Do you prefer salty or sweet? Usually salty. But sometimes I'm really in the mood for dessert!

12. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex? Their smile for sure. I have a thing about nice teeth. ;)

13. What is the last movie you watched? I watched a Hallmark Hall of Fame movie on TV last night. It was called "The Makeover". The show was not bad. It had Camryn Manheim and Julia Stiles, and I like them both. And the guy in it was super cute. I doubt I would watch it again though.

14. Are you religious? Yes.

15. Are you a neat freak, a slob, or somewhere in between? I am not the best housekeeper, let's put it that way. I'd hate to classify myself as a slob. I would say more that I'm not very good at cleaning up constantly after my family of 6 - so things can get pretty cluttery around here!

16. Share something from your bucket list that you hope to do someday. I'd like to get back east and do a U.S. History tour. Only not an actual guided tour - just go everywhere I want, maybe with a friend who knows a lot about the area and history.

17. Are you a risk taker, or do you prefer to play it safe? I'm really a great big chicken for the most part. But it depends on the situation.

18. Have you ever worn braces? Yes. I got them halfway through 6th grade, and wore them all through 7th grade.

19. Would you rather spend an evening at a theater or at a club? I would have to say a theater.

20. If you could have three wishes, what would one of them be? This one also changes depending on where I'm at in life. Right now it is that all goes well with Baby Girl's delivery. For some reason I am way more anxious this time than I have been in the past.

Flashback Friday

2013-01-25T11:53:00.000-07:00

I thought it would be fun to snag some random pictures that I have stored on the computer, and flashback to the time they were taken. Makes me feel all reminscey. And that is totally a word.

But first I wanted to give an update on my post from yesterday. Remember I told you that the one journal that didn't sell for Cowgirl's first experience with Mini Society business day was her one attempt at making a "boy" journal? Well apparently this week they've all changed their minds, because there are so many people that want it, that it had to go up for auction. She had them priced to sell for $15.00 each (school money). The bidding on her one boy journal is now at $70! So she's excited to see what it finally sells for.

Now on the the flashbacks!

This first picture was taken when Monkey was 3. I had to run to our insurance office to sign some paperwork. Monkey had asked for an apple to eat on the way. When we pulled into the parking lot and I opened the door to get her out, here's what I saw:

Have you ever fallen asleep while eating an apple?

This next shot is of Pixie. She was also 3 when this shot was taken. It was Independence Day, which of course is my second favorite holiday (a close second to Christmas). We always spend the day celebrating. There are different fairs/carnivals going on around the valley, and we ALWAYS go to the park to watch the beautiful fireworks display celebrating our wonderful country. The kids also usually dress all festive and patriotic. I think Pixie looks adorable in this picture with her patriotic stars, and I LOVE her hair this length.

This picture is Cowgirl. I believe she was in 3rd grade at the time. Her class at school was learning about wetlands. The class got to go out and take water samples, and evaluate their findings to determine if this particular river was healthy or not. Cowgirl is getting ready, and putting on her hip waders. All the kids looked so stinkin' cute in their waders! And they had a blast while learning a lot!

Last is Bookworm. I LOVE this shot. It was at scout camp, and was his first time EVER ice fishing. He caught the biggest fish of all the boys and when Hubby sent me this picture, I couldn't stop smiling. He was really excited to bring it home and have me cook it up for dinner!

I love looking back, and remembering through pictures all the great experiences we've had as a family. Or just funny moments even. I have so many pictures that I have taken because I wanted to capture the moment, and then haven't gotten around to scrapbooking or journaling them.

I may do a flashback every Friday, just so I can start getting some of the things I remember recorded - before I forget! I hope you don't mind, and have a great weekend!

Mini Entrepreneur

2013-01-24T09:51:00.001-07:00

Today I'm linking up to PMM, so I can brag on Cowgirl.

She's in 6th grade. One of the things they do is called Mini Society. I'm sure you've seen or heard of similar things at your kids' schools. But basically their classroom is a mini society. They have to earn "money", pay for their privileges, etc. They regularly have a day where they run a business in order to make more money, and also have the opportunity to spend their money.

Before the first time, Cowgirl was brainstorming, trying to figure out what she could sell. I remembered a couple of weeks earlier I had seen that she had taken one of the composition notebooks I had gotten her for school, and scrapped it all cute and girlie. She did it on her own, just for fun. I suggested she could sell cute, scrapped "journals". She loved the idea and got to work.

I have been pretty useless in the evenings as far as helping my kids out with stuff. I'm just so exhausted by then. So I sat on the couch giving moral support and encouragement, while she quietly worked away with my Cricut, cute papers, hot glue, double sided tape, and some cute embellishments from my bow-making stash. She designed them all herself, and they turned out really cute. She paired them with some cute pencils from the dollar store and they were a big hit. Not only did she sell nearly every journal (the only one left was her attempt at a "boy" one, and I guess no boys were interested), but she got 3 custom orders!

Today is the second time they are doing their businesses, so she was up last night making more. Including some miniature ones as well. I think they turned out really cute - especially since once again she was all on her own! I hope she has some great sales again today.

Click the button to check out more Proud Mommy Moments.

Random Ravings...

2013-01-23T00:05:00.000-07:00

So I've had a few days of writer's block. I feel like the only thing I'm really focused on right now is trying to get ready for Baby Girl - since we are down to crunch time! I know that not everybody is into reading endlessly about motherhood and baby prep. But without that - I got nothin'. So sorry!

Is there anybody else who still has their Christmas decor up? Because I just always seem to have way more urgent things to do than un-decorate. And once I get a more urgent task completed, I'm so freaking tired that I just don't have it in me to dive into the project of decor-switching! I'm seriously sick of looking at it though!

I ordered my car seat today. Nothing like waiting until the last minute! I sure hope it get's here before Baby Girl does! Here's what we picked:

It's the Graco Snugride 35

I'm sorry if this is not incredibly fascinating to everyone else, but I haven't done this for almost 7 years! It's like I'm a first time mom all over again!

I only used an infant car seat/carrier with Bookworm. And by "used" I mean paid for and then never used it as a carrier because he just screamed his guts out the entire time he was buckled in. Never fell asleep in it, and never was content in it when used with the stroller. So basically we would end up carrying the carrier in one hand, and bookworm in the other. NOT the convenience I thought I was paying for! Add that to the fact that he was too tall for it by 4 months, and it seemed like an unnecessary added expense. We skipped the infant seat with the other 3 and just went straight to a convertible seat that went from 5-35 lbs.

We're giving the carrier version another try, in the hopes that this baby won't be as naughty as Bookworm was as a baby! Also because they seem to have come a long way, and accommodate baby for a much longer period of time with broader height and weight limits.

Something else that's evolved quite a bit since my last time around? Bottles made for nursing babies! I used Avent with my other babies, because they were supposedly the best for babies switching back and forth from breast to bottle. But I wasn't necessarily in love with them. I've been doing some research to prepare for this baby, and the bottles are really, REALLY shaped like boobs! Here's what I think we're gonna go with:

I've read lots of great reviews about them. I welcome other suggestions and feedback though!

Okay, something to talk about that isn't baby-related....

Anybody watching The Bachelor? I never watch it, but from the coverage I saw of last season, I really liked Shawn. So when I found out he was the Bachelor this season, I decided to give it a try. I think it's 3 episodes in? I'm not sure I can keep it up....I can't handle how pathetic all the women act! I guess I'll just take my cop shows over drama-filled reality TV.

So, as you can now tell, I have a pretty boring life as of late! But I just didn't want to fall back into the habit of letting more and more time pass between blog posts, until it gets to the point that I'm not blogging at all! Thanks for hanging in with me if you made it this far!

And if you know of any great link parties that happen on a regular basis - please let me know so I have something to fall back on when I'm drawing a blank!

If you haven't already, you can still enter my baby-guessing contest here!

Go away winter and a contest!

2013-01-18T09:06:00.002-07:00

I am SO glad there's no school for my kids today! It's 4 degrees outside my house right now! I really am sooooo over winter. I'm very happy that we had a white Christmas, but as far as I'm concerned, once the holidays are over, winter is just a big, cold, annoying driving hazard! And the inversion in the Salt Lake valley is awful!

But enough complaining. Who has fun plans for the weekend? We'll mostly be at home trying to get stuff ready for baby (yes, I've waited until the last minute - don't you know me by now?), but Bookworm does have a church basketball game tomorrow afternoon. That should be fun.

As always the kids are wondering when the baby will get here. We are now in the "safe zone" as far as health and development if she were to decide to come early. How about a fun little contest for my readers? I'll send prizes to the reader(s) that are able to guess the closest date of delivery, weight, and length of Baby Girl (3 separate prizes). Sound like fun?

So here's some history:

I can't recall off the top of my head which baby was exactly what length, but my kids all ranged from 19.5 inches to 21 inches.

Bookworm: Due date - July 2, actual delivery date - June 30. Weight: 8 lb 4 oz.
Cowgirl: Due date - October 2, actual delivery date - September 30. Weight: 9 lb 4 oz.
Pixie: Due date - February 2, actual delivery date - February 3. Weight: 8 lb 8 oz.
Monkey: Due date - October 5, actual delivery date - October 6. Weight: 9 lb 4 oz.

So as you can see, I have big babies, and they come pretty close to their due dates.

The contest will be open up until Baby Girl gets here! Her due date is February 2. Yep, same due date as Pixie had. She REALLY wants the baby to be born on her birthday. We'll see how long she likes that, if it does actually happen!

I'm not sure what the prizes will be yet - but they won't be lame! So if you'd like to enter, just leave a comment with your guess on delivery date, weight and length!

I hope everyone has a great weekend!

Oh, Baby! pt. 3

2013-01-17T00:00:00.000-07:00

Already a brat:

So as you could tell from parts 1 and 2 - my kids are pretty excited about this new baby sister that is joining our family.

Monkey kisses my belly every time she walks past. But Bookworm has been the one that has warmed our hearts with his joy about the baby, and his tenderness. He is ALWAYS asking me how I am and how baby is doing. If I seem uncomfortable in any way he always asks if I am feeling okay.

He is always concerned that I am doing things that are the best for the baby. I've gotten a few lectures from him about not drinking Dr. Pepper. One Sunday afternoon I took a much needed nap. After I woke up, Bookworm told me he had looked in on me a few times while I was sleeping, and that every time he walked past the door, I was sleeping on my stomach. He asked me, "is that safe for the baby?"

He has been so sweet and adorable. Which makes it so ironic that of all the kids he was the last one who ever got to feel her kick.

The kids asked for months when they would be able to feel the baby kick from the outside. Finally when she started kicking harder, I would have them sit with their hand on my tummy until she gave a good kick. Monkey got to feel her kick first. We were taking a nap on my bed and Baby Girl started kicking. I rested her hand on my belly while we were laying there, and she patiently waited, and it paid off! Next was Pixie while we were sitting in church. And Cowgirl got to feel her kick while sitting next to me on the couch watching TV.

But no matter how hard she was kicking, or how frequently, as soon as bookworm would put his hand on my tummy, she would freeze instantly. And no matter how long he sat, patiently waiting to feel her kick, she wouldn't. Then when he'd finally give up and get back to his homework, or head back to his room, or whatever he was doing - she'd start kicking again. What a stinker, right?

It was WEEKS from the time the girls started feeling her kick, before Bookworm got to finally feel a kick. And during those weeks the girls felt her kick several times, but always Bookworm's efforts went unrewarded! What do you think? Is she already a spoiled brat?

When he finally was able to feel her kick, he made sure to announce it to everyone!

Obviously I've removed his name and location - but this is a screenshot of his FB page.

16 more days until her due date....we are counting down now!

Oh, Baby! pt. 2

2013-01-15T00:00:00.002-07:00

Today I'm linking up with my girls Shawn and IA, which I haven't done in forever! If you want to read part 1, go here.

The Gender Reveal:

The kids were so excited about the fact that we were adding another member to our family!

After I had my first appointment, we told them that they could come to the next appointment and hear the heartbeat. Well the next appointment happened to be the week of the big scare. We decided that we shouldn't bring the kids, in case there were any problems. Once we knew what was going on, if everything was okay, we would take them to the next appointment.

My doctor ended up having to push that next appointment back a week, and by that time the kids were back in school. They begged us to check them out of school, and we made the deal with them that we would check them out of school to come to the ultrasound, OR to come hear the heartbeat. But not both. Of course they all chose the ultrasound.

When it finally got to the week of my ultrasound, I called the hospital to set up my appointment. They went over all the rules with me. One of them was "only 1 other adult and no children." WHAT??? I have never been prevented from bringing children to the ultrasound before and I was super bummed. But not nearly as much as the kids were.

They kept asking us if we would call the school and tell them if they were having a baby brother or sister once we found out. We tried to explain that we couldn't just call the school and have them called out of class, disrupting everyone, just so we could tell them. They didn't understand why not. They think because I'm on the board I can just do whatever I feel like, without regard to protocol. I probably could without having anyone say anything to me, but it doesn't mean it wouldn't bother people, or that I should. I try not to overstep my bounds. Too much. ;) They were super bugged at the thought that we would find out in the morning, and they had to wait clear until after school to find out.

Here's what I did do. I had seen this cute little idea on Pinterest about using a paint strip and sharpie to announce baby's gender. So I grabbed some paint strips at Walmart on the way home from the ultrasound. I went into the office at school and made a photocopy of the best ultrasound picture for each of my kids. I wrote on the paint strip and stuck the strip and the picture in an envelope, then wrote the name of one of my children (not in my normal handwriting) on each envelope. Then I asked one of the awesome ladies who works at the front desk to deliver them to my kids in class. She of course stuck around to spy on their reactions. They all started out looking confused and then when they opened their envelope, without exception got huge grins as they realized what it meant. She was expecting Bookworm to be disappointed, but she loved that he just got a big smile and leaned over to show his friends.

This is the picture I used to announce on Facebook. I wrote the words a little differently on the strips I gave to my kids, but this will give you the main idea.

After school the kids were once again full of excitement and questions. The girls gave me their envelopes to put in my purse so they wouldn't get lost or ruined. I asked Bookworm what he did with his picture. His reply? "I hung it up in my locker."

Oh, Baby! pt. 1

2013-01-14T00:00:00.000-07:00

So I haven't really blogged much throughout my pregnancy, and I thought I'd take a few days to recap some of the memorable moments regarding Baby Girl.

Breaking the News:

If you remember, this pregnancy was completely unplanned, and unexpected! Although our children kept pestering us to have another baby, we had decided that we were done. I'm not gonna lie - when those 2 lines showed up instantly, I was in a little bit of shock. As was Hubby. I think we've spent the majority of the pregnancy feeling overwhelmed and trying to process the fact that we need to get back into baby mode, after being out of it for many years. But it's impossible not to take delight in the way the kids are being about this new little life that is about to join our family.

When it came time to tell the kids, we gathered them all around for a family meeting. We had recently asked Bookworm if he wanted to move his bedroom downstairs, as Cowgirl was doing (our ulterior motive was so that I could have my craft room/office upstairs). He responded, "No, I really like my room, and I like having it up here."

So we started off our conversation directing our comments to him. We asked, "remember how you said you didn't want to move downstairs? Well we were wondering if you would be willing to move downstairs so that the baby can have your room?" Cowgirl's hands immediately flew to her mouth, her eyes got big and she had a huge grin. Bookworm didn't catch on so quickly. His response was, "What baby?" When I replied, "The new baby we're going to have", I heard a squeal of delight from one of the other girls, and Bookworm had a huge smile, but still wanted to make sure he wasn't mistaken. "Our baby? Are you serious? You're going to have a baby?" All 4 kids were delighted and excited. And they all started talking and asking questions at once.

It was a great night full of love and excitement, and I still want to giggle out loud when I think about their reaction to the news. You would think their excitement would have worn off over the months, but it really hasn't. They are as excited as ever and can't wait to meet the newest little member of our family!

I really adore these sweet kids.

Yes this is their Christmas card picture from LAST year - we didn't get around to pictures (or Christmas cards!) this year.

Discrimination or Common Sense?

2013-01-10T00:00:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I read this article on our local news website. If you don't want to go to the link, here's a quick summary:

An 11 year old girl who has been playing in a community youth football league for 2 seasons has been told that she won't be able to come back next season and play with the league, which is supposed to be an all-boys league.

People are up in arms! And the family has started an online petition calling for the Catholic Youth Organization to allow girls to play in the league.

I guess I'm missing something. I don't see this policy as discriminatory, or old fashioned. I see it as common sense in protecting participants, as well as the league's own liability.

Cowgirl (age 12) is an excellent soccer player. She loves it. A couple of seasons ago, she was invited by her then coach to join a competitive (all-girls) soccer league that he was moving his daughter to, out of our local recreational league. She went and practiced with the team and loved it. But the more she thought about it, the more she felt like she would like to work on her skills a little bit more in our rec league before doing competition soccer. She signed up for another season of rec league (which is a co-ed league).

She still loves it. She is still one of the best players on her team. She's better than the majority of the boys she has played against, and most of the boys on her team. But she has relinquished her (well-loved) position of playing goalie. After the first couple of games I asked her why the coach wasn't letting her play goalie. She told me that she had been offered goalie but had told her coach she preferred not to play that position. I was shocked - in previous years she had always had to sort of fight to get the chance to play goalie, due to several boys also wanting that position. I asked her "why?"

"Mom," she said, "The boys my age have gotten so BIG - and they kick HARD!! When I block or catch the ball it hurts!"

She still has the skills to hold her own with the boys. But it is reaching the point that the physical differences in the way the female and male bodies are built is starting to make a difference, despite her talent. It will soon be time to move onto an all-girls league.

And that's in soccer. I can't imagine having her play a full-contact, tackle sport with some of the boys that I see her playing soccer with.

So am I crazy to think this decision by the youth organization is a little more based on common sense than on discrimination? I just think the people all fired up about this are trying to create controversy where there doesn't really need to be any.

Public Service Announcement

2013-01-09T09:26:00.002-07:00

Does anybody else hold the hair elastic(s) between their teeth while using both hands to comb little girls' hair into a ponytail, so that you can just grab the elastic out of your mouth and wrap the ponytail once it's combed into place? And did that description even make any sense at all?

I'm here to warn you. I almost died this morning. Okay that may be a small exaggeration. But I really did nearly choke - like for reals choke.

I was combing Monkey's hair - we were running a little behind schedule, and Hubby and the other girls were already out in the car waiting for Monkey to join them so they could head to school. I had the elastic between my teeth. I had opened the cupboard beneath the sink to grab a spray bottle with one hand, while holding Monkey's hair in place with the other. I was in a hurry and sort of slammed the cupboard back shut.

It smacked Monkey's knee, and she gave a little yelp of pain. I instinctively gasped, and literally inhaled the elastic from between my teeth and it went halfway down my throat!!

I gagged for a second and coughed it up, so I was okay...but seriously - who does that?

Most of you probably aren't special enough to have something like that happen to you - but I thought I'd warn you just in case!

Have a great Wednesday.

Everyone's On Board

2013-01-08T01:43:00.002-07:00

Yesterday I talked about resolutions and goals, and told you of my plan to have our whole family set some goals that would help us improve ourselves in a few different categories. The plan was to narrow it down to a few goals that would have a big impact, rather than a million different goals that would overwhelm us, and quickly discourage our efforts. I wanted to present it in a Family Home Evening lesson, along with a plan for tracking our progress, and a way to help us keep focused and accountable. I won't share all the goals right now (there are 6 of us you know!), but I thought I'd tell you what I came up with and how it went.

I first went and purchased 6 composition notebooks. They all had different fun designs. This is the one I picked for Monkey:

Now I'm not gonna lie. The only reason we had cutesy decorated notebooks was because they were all out of the cheap plain ones. But you can usually find the plain ones for under a dollar at Target or Walmart.

We started out our FHE lesson talking about some of the things we had heard in the church talk about goals and resolutions. Then we talked about how we are taught that Jesus has asked us to be perfect, even as He is. And how it is so important to set goals, and work towards them, and continually try to improve ourselves.

We then opened to the first page of our notebooks, and thought about, then wrote down 1 goal in each of 3 separate categories: Spiritual, Home and Family, and Personal Improvement. There was no time limit. I had already been thinking of my goals, but I wanted the rest of my family to be able to really think about what goals they could set that would have the most valuable impact on their lives right now. So we just worked on it until everyone was finished writing down their 3 goals.

Next we divided the remaining pages of the notebooks into 3 sections - one for each goal category. On the first page of each section we wrote down our plan for achieving that specific goal. Whether it be smaller goals that were steps to reaching the main goal, or creating a tracking sheet to keep a record, or simply reminder cards placed in strategic places that we could see throughout our day. Each family member was responsible for making their own plan for achieving each of their 3 goals.

The rest of the pages in each section are journaling pages. Each Sunday will be a time for reviewing each goal, and evaluating and recording our progress - making note of successes as well as failures, and writing down our thoughts about what we're learning as we work on each of our goals. We don't ONLY have to journal on Sunday. If we have an idea, concern or victory during the week regarding one of our goals, we can jot it down at the time. But we will always have an "official" goal-journaling time on Sunday. Then each Monday at the very beginning of FHE, we will have the opportunity to share how we are doing with each other. I told the kids that if one of their goals is really personal, they don't have to share if they'd prefer not to. But I also think that sharing and reporting to each other is a good way to help us all stay accountable and on track with working on our goals. It is also a good opportunity for everyone else to offer encouragement and ideas or suggestions to help us when we might be feeling like we're not doing the best.

Surprisingly, all the kids and the husband seemed eager to get to work. I was helping Monkey most of the time with writing down her goals and coming up with a plan, but I would occasionally look around and each member of the rest of my family was always thoughtfully writing in their notebook. I don't know what their goals are yet - we will be sharing those next week after we've had a few days to work on them - but I am eager to see what they have come up with!

I love my family, and I'm excited to see how we learn and grow individually and as a family over the next year as we work on reaching our goals. I really feel like it is going to make a big difference in our home. I'm sure I'll be sharing with you some of our different goals and how we're doing on them along the way...I hope you don't mind!

Aiming High

2013-01-07T00:00:00.000-07:00

I often hear people talk about how they don't bother with New Year's resolutions anymore, because they never keep them and then they have guilt, etc.

I've never been able to quite feel comfortable with that perspective for myself. One of the core principles of my faith is the responsibility to live up to our potential - to be continually improving, striving to be like our Savior and overcoming our weaknesses. Goal setting seems the most logical way to continue to move forward on the path of self improvement.

A friend and neighbor of mine gave a talk in church last week, and one of the things she talked about was the opportunity goal setting provides for growth and improvement, even when we don't achieve everything we set out to. She talked about how making some progress on a goal or resolution gets us that much further ahead than we were before. Or than we would be if we simply chose not to set any goals for ourselves. This really struck me as something important to remember.

The beginning of a new year seems to leave us all eager to turn the page on the past, start anew and do things better. Whether we like to call them "resolutions" or not, we all have things in our head that we intend to do better this year.

For me, there is a lot. But I'm going to try to narrow it down to a main goal or 2 in each of 3 different areas. I don't have it all ironed out yet, but it is going to be the topic of our Family Home Evening lesson tonight. I'm going to challenge each family member to set a spiritual goal, a goal to help improve our home/family, and a personal improvement goal (like fitness, money management, school, etc.). I'm still working out a good tracking method that will hopefully help us keep focused and accountable. I welcome any suggestions!

I know that a big theme for my goals is going to have to be "simplify". I have a new baby on the way - 4 weeks at the most until she arrives! I have my school board responsibilities, I also have 3 kids taking music lessons, and 2 of them playing a sport. There is a lot to complicate my life if I let it and I have got to come up with a way to reduce the stress and enjoy being a mom and wife, because I really don't want to look back and regret my level of enjoyment during my children's growing up years. I want to remember being happy, and truly enjoying all the experiences we have together.

I'm trying to come up with a plan to be able to fit regular blogging back into my schedule, because I think sharing with my friends my ideas, successes and failures, as well as asking for advice, are great ways to keep me striving to reach my goals. I hope you'll all be able to help encourage me, and give me suggestions to help me along the journey this year!

Tomorrow I'll tell you how Family Home Evening went, what I came up with, and maybe share how we're going to track it as well.

Do you set New Year's resolutions? If so, how do you stay on track, and what is a favorite resolution for this year?

Good Riddance to 2012!!

2013-01-04T01:04:00.001-07:00

Pretty much. That's how I feel.

Not EVERYTHING in 2012 was horrible. I had the great delight of meeting and spending time with several blog friends that really, I consider IRL friends. It started out with Sami, which led to spending some actual time with Evelyn (we had met very briefly before), then Vivienne, followed by MiMi (already had met!), Myya and Amanda. THEN I also got to meet and spend time with Emmy, who introduced me to Involuntary Amy (who I hadn't previously "known" through blogging). Sounds like a lot of fabulous meet-ups, huh? Well they were! But then I think somebody decided I had had too much greatness and that the rest of my year should be the suckiest year ever.

I meant to do a series of blog posts to catch up on the wonderful trials that were thrown our way during the 2nd half of the year - but I just couldn't bring myself to do that many whiny blog posts in a row. So I decided to just do a brief (or maybe not so brief?) re-cap (via bullet points - or asterisks, because I'm too lazy to format bullet points) for you in one long, whiny blog post. You. Are. Welcome.

* The night I met up with Emmy and Amy, I started to get a sore throat. By the time Emmy dropped me off it had developed into full on body aches, chills and a fever. Then came the coughing. I haven't been rid of that dang cough since. Yep, still coughing the following January.

*All the hard work and stress that Tanielle and I put into our first ever self-hosted boutique was rained out, followed by a big pregnancy scare for me. You can read about that here.

* I blogged about the too sudden departure of my dad from this life here.

Picture I didn't have a digital copy of when I did the post about my dad. I miss him.

* I was still coughing and Tanielle's kids were suffering from a stubborn summer cold. Or so we thought. Turns out it was Pertussis. Yep, whooping cough. Before the diagnosis, Tanielle had brought some food over to our home, upon the news of my father's death. My kids went out to the car to visit and play around with her kids. Nice, enclosed space. Lots of coughing. Pretty much both of our whole families ended up coughing a lot. She had confirmed Pertussis diagnoses for all her kids. I didn't have everyone tested, but did take a couple of mine in and got a confirmed diagnosis. Antibiotics for everyone!! My family didn't suffer nearly as much. Since we knew we had been exposed, at the first onset of symptoms we were put on treatment, and it significantly reduced the intensity of our symptoms. But it still sucked being quarantined, and taking care of everyone while exhausted and pregnant. T's family ended up miserable, exhausted, and 1 baby in the hospital. No fun!

*After the bout with Pertussis, I thought things might start to look up. But instead my mom fell when going out her back door, and landed on her wrist. Breaking it. This was the first time it struck me that I was really worried about her being all alone. She had always been my dad's caretaker, but at least he was THERE to know if anything happened, and he could get help if she needed it.

* My cough finally started to subside. For like a minute. Then it came back full force, and it was worse, and it HURT! By this time I had significant baby growth, my abdominal muscles were weakening, and the coughing fits caused so much pain that I was sometimes brought to tears. There was a point when I was sure I had developed a hernia from the coughing it hurt so bad.

* After a couple weeks of the really horrible coughing, it eased up a bit. Just in time for me to get the phone call from my mom's friend that they had been out walking, and she slipped on the ice. She got back up and seemed okay, until they passed a sign that was reminding the Relief Society sisters to come for a special holiday program that night. My mom turned to her friend and asked her what it was. You can imagine how this alarmed her friend, since my mom was the one in charge of the program and had been working on it for weeks. We're talking assigning speaking parts, putting together costumes for each of the women in the presentation, assigning people to bring refreshments. She had been at my house just the day before typing up the program. That was a lovely day spent in the ER - time that my mom still doesn't remember, weeks later. She had quite a concussion, but thankfully no fracture or internal bleeding. The short term memory from BEFORE her fall came back as the hours went on, but she doesn't remember much from the day OF her fall, including falling.

* Still coughing at this point and getting really sick of it.

* The bright shining moment of the second half of the year was our school's musical production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat. Bookworm landed the role of Joseph. Cowgirl was part of Pharaoh's Court, as well as the ensemble chorus.

Cowgirl, Bookworm and T's daughter Lexlee after closing night.

It really was a spectacular production - I can't even put into words what an amazing job our director and cast did. You would never believe it was just a public school musical if you didn't know better. I'm sad that we didn't have the budget to purchase recording rights to the show, because I don't have any video of their performing, and it really was such a proud moment for Hubby and I.

Now back to the whining...

* During the time leading up to the play, I was still coughing like crazy. I had to OD on cough medicine just to be able to attend the performances without being a completely disruptive presence! But worse than that was that Bookworm and Cowgirl both got my cough just in time for the show. Luckily the Robitussin seemed to keep it under control enough for them to perform.

* They started to get better until the couple of days before Christmas. Then here's how it went: Monkey had to be checked out from school the last day before Christmas break with a fever. She spent several days just crappy feeling, and hanging onto that fever. Cowgirl got it the day before Christmas. Both got to celebrate Christmas morning with fevers. Monkey felt so crappy that she didn't even want to open her gifts. That's a sad situation for parents who are so excited to see their little one open her gifts! My cough flared up again, Hubby woke up a couple days later with body aches and chills, as well as a cheerful dose of vomiting. Everyone in the house except bookworm is coughing. Monkey and Cowgirl take a turn for the worse, and have to be taken into the doctor the day after Christmas. Not only do they have lovely hacking coughs and fevers, but they also have severe ear infections. Pretty much the entire break has been spent with the majority of our family being moderately sick, or sometimes very sick. It's been awesome - lemme tell ya.

At this point everyone is feeling mostly well, but with a few of us still coughing. The Salt Lake City inversion is not helping. Nobody has fevers or earaches, or chills anymore, but everyone is still exhausted from trying to "do the holidays" while being sick. Luckily, our Christmas break lasts until the 7th. hopefully everyone will be feeling ship shape by then.

Do I sound like the biggest whiner ever? I FEEL like the biggest whiner ever!

But here's the thing. Even with all that crappiness, I look around and I know I have so much to be grateful for. Although we've dealt with sickness - I have a healthy family. I don't have a child with a terminal illness, or sever emotional problems. I have a husband who is able-bodied and willing to work hard to take care of our family. I'm married to a man who is a generous husband and loving father. I have children who try hard to do what's right, and treat others with kindness. I have close relationships with those in my extended family and they are positive parts of my children's lives. I have amazing neighbors and friends. I really have too many blessings to even begin to name them all.

So I guess instead of bitterly bidding good riddance to 2012, I will just happily embrace 2013 and count on it being a better year than the last!

I hope everyone has had a great start to the New Year!

Letting Go

2012-11-16T00:17:00.000-07:00

I hope you'll bear with me as I get through this difficult post. It has been on my mind for months, and it's hard to know what details are important to include, and what can be left out. There is so much that has been going through my mind, and many details that I want to make sure I don't forget with time. I'm sure this post will be quite long.

After the bad news about my dad and the scare with the baby, I was ready for life to calm down. I was ready to start having more energy, and to enjoy the rest of my summer. Life had other plans for me.

Thursday was the day I was finally able to get off bed rest. I had missed my birthday and we had postponed my family birthday dinner which was to have taken place the previous Sunday. It was okay because my brother, who had been in North Dakota for 5 months was returning, so by moving the dinner back one week, we would be able to have a Welcome Home dinner for him, along with my birthday dinner, and everyone would be there.

Thursday morning, as I was getting ready for my doctor's appointment, my mom stopped by to drop something off. She had taken my dad in for one of his dr. appointments. He stayed in the car, and as I spoke with my mom in the bathroom, while doing my hair, I sent my kids out to say hi to grandpa. Hubby went out as well. Don't ask me why I didn't put down the flat iron and run out there with them. I had spoken to him on the phone several times that week, and we would be at their house on Sunday. I did call my parents after the appointment to let them both know everything was fine. I really can't remember if it was my dad or my mom that I spoke to.

The next morning I received a call from my mom. She told me that when she had gone in to check on my dad that morning, he was on his back and his breathing was really labored, and his oxygen level was way down. My parents have slept in different rooms for several years, due to the many side effects of my dad's medication that affect him during sleep, and make it impossible for my mom to sleep. A stab of fear shot through my heart, but I reminded myself that he had been fine just yesterday and was even out and about with my mom. I told her we would be right over.

My brother was on his way from North Dakota. He was getting a ride and was to be dropped off at our house where he was going to try and get some sleep. I called him to let him know what was going on, that we would be out at mom's, and to let us know when he got in and we would come pick him up. Cowgirl was also at Girls' Camp, and would be heading home that morning. I called her leader and asked her not to bring Cowgirl all the way home, because we wouldn't be there, but that we would meet them at the freeway exit by my parents' house on their way home.

My mom called back a few minutes later and let us know that she had turned Dad's oxygen all the way up, and gotten him onto his side, and that his oxygen levels had gone up and were looking good. She said not to worry about coming out, but in my heart I knew that we needed to.

When we got there, Dad still hadn't woken up. We sat and visited with Mom, and each of us went in and sat and talked with Dad throughout the morning. Cowgirl and my brother both arrived about the same time. My other brother was already there because he and his wife are renting the basement in my parents' house right now. My sister whom is my dad's daughter from his first marriage had also made it over. We were all there and were able to spend time at Dad's side, and spend the day together as a family.

As the hours went on and we still couldn't get Dad to wake up, we started talking about what we should do. My mom had spoken with a hospice worker (they had just contacted hospice to start looking into what kind of in-home health care they could set up for dad). The hospice worker was supposed to come that morning to evaluate Dad and get things set up. They said they would still come over and check his oxygen, and his lungs and physical condition, so we would have a better idea of what was going on. Then my dad's lung doctor called and my mom discussed with him one of the treatments that they were supposed to be looking into, a machine that would push the Co2 out of Dad's lungs. The doctor told her that it was very likely that if they did that treatment, he would be able to come out of it and wake up. But, there was no guarantee, and it would require us calling an ambulance and him being admitted to the hospital. He also told us that once he was admitted, it would be very difficult to get him released.

There were a few things that my dad was very adamant about upon receiving the bad news about his health. When the time came, he did not want any drastic life-saving measures taken (as there was no actually recovering from this condition, just prolonging the inevitable, if it got to that point). He did NOT want to be taken in an ambulance to the hospital, and above all he wanted to be at home, in his own bed when the time came for him to leave this life.

We were now faced with a difficult decision. He had been doing really well in the couple of weeks since we found out that his lungs weren't going to hold out, and he had appointments that week to see if he was a good candidate for the treatment I mentioned above. If he woke up, that would still be an option, and he might have many more good months, or even longer ahead of him. For me this would mean him being here to meet my new baby, which was so, so important to me.

But we would have to go against his wishes and have him transported to the hospital via ambulance. And was using a bpap machine to push all the Co2 from his lungs considered drastic life-saving measures? Also, we didn't know how long he had gone without a sufficient amount of oxygen. Could there be a chance that there would be some brain damage as a result of prolonged deprivation of sufficient oxygen? It was so hard to know what the right thing to do was.

My brother that had been in North Dakota had just left for a short time to take care of some personal business. We called him to see if he could come and talk with us as we considered what we should do. I'm not sure if it was all too hard for him to deal with, and he just needed to be away for a while, or what, but he let us know his opinion over the phone, but said he would respect whatever was decided upon. He wasn't coming back for a while.

We decided to wait for the hospice worker (who was on her way), hear what she had to say after evaluating him, and then with all the information, make a decision as a family. I called my brother again to see if he wanted to be there when the hospice worker came so he could hear what she had to say. He said he didn't think his opinion would change, but that we should call him after she came and let him know what she said.

While we were waiting for her arrival, my brother showed up. He spent some good time in my dad's room talking with him. He is the only one who hadn't been able to spend time with him recently, as he had been gone for 5 months. When the hospice worker arrived, my mom went in the room with her as she started checking my dad's vitals, and explaining some things as she went along. My mom asked us (the grown up kids) to come in so we could all hear what she had to say.

She explained that his oxygen level was good, and she took him off his oxygen to see if his level would stay up or start dropping. It stayed pretty steady, and she started checking his skin tone, his pulse, etc. As she was talking, my dad paused in his breathing. She mentioned that he may be getting ready to leave. We had my kids join us, so they could be with him too, in case that was what was happening. He took one last breath, with us all surrounding him, Mom holding his hand, kids and grandkids hugging him, then the nurse checked his heart and found that it had stopped beating.

She left the room so we could all have some time with him. We shed many tears, and shared many embraces. Then we left Mom to have some last moments alone with him. It was such a bittersweet day for our family. It was so hard to let go, especially for my children. We knew he wasn't to be with us a great deal longer, but he also was doing really well and we expected more time before we had to say goodbye. We weren't ready. On the other hand, my mom, along with his children had watched him suffer so much pain for so many years, that we took great comfort in knowing that he was pain-free for the first time in decades. We were also so grateful that we were all able to be together as a family to say goodbye when it was time.

I'm not sure what made my brother change his mind that afternoon, and decide to come home and join us, but I truly believe my dad was waiting for us all to be there together before he left. I know we will see him again, and that we will be together as a family for eternity. I'm so grateful for the gospel truths that bring this comfort to me.

I think I am coping okay. I'm not one who likes to shed tears in front of others. I am pretty good most of the time. But I definitely have my moments, and on a pretty regular basis. When I'm driving in the car by myself, or am in the shower alone with my thoughts, or even in public and I overhear some old guy say something old fashioned or closed-minded that reminds me of something my dad would say, I get hit with unexpected emotion, and have to blink away the tears. Or sometimes I let it come and just have a good hard cry.

The hardest times are when one of my children comes to me. "I'm just thinking a lot about Grandpa today", they tell me. "I just miss him so much". And the tears come, and I just give them a hug and let them know that's okay. It's okay to miss him, and to cry. But we know we are crying for us, and that he is free from pain, and that is such a blessing.

He would have turned 64 in September. I miss him every day. I wish he could have stayed with us just a little bit longer. Long enough to hold his baby granddaughter in his arms. At least once. Long enough to have one more birthday here with us. Or one more Christmas. I trust my Heavenly Father's plan for us, and I know He knows more than me. But I still miss my dad, even if it was his time to say goodbye to this life.

I have more thoughts to share, but this may already be the longest post I have ever written. I'll just finish up with a few pictures I love. Most of my favorites are prints, and I don't have a digital copy - but I do have a few that were taken in the past few years that are saved on my computer.

At Cowgirl's baptism

Giving Monkey a ride at my brother's wedding

He loved being a grandpa

Watching hubby work on the car (in the gas station parking lot) that had issues the day my brother got married, in between the temple, and going to the wedding luncheon. It cracks me up because even though there was no way he could get on the ground like that and work on the car, he still had to watch, like he didn't trust that it could get done right without him there supervising.

My absolute most favorite. Cowgirl and Monkey walking alongside grandpa at the County Fair last year. It was a family tradition to go to the County Fair every year with Grandpa and Grandma.